Few things can blow our minds better than anxiety. Everyone deals with major life events, sometimes occurring at once. While some may be "good" (such as, for me, preparing for a trip or publishing my book), they still evoke similar physiological responses to stress as unwanted events might. Take the book project, which is the closest I'll ever get to giving birth in this lifetime (I suspect it's not as painful, but considering the decades of gestation period...), just as I think I'm nearing the end of the work, something comes up that makes me want to revise, edit, or burn the manuscript.
What did I do the other day when I was tripping? Some simple methods to calm myself down before I do something I might regret:
1. Reach out to a friend. I called a fellow writer who talked me down.
2. Make a list. It helps diminish the nebulous cloud of worry. Plus, I was able to check things off (or scratch the hell out of them off the page).
3. Sit with the anxiety. Feel it. Write about it. Coax it - what we resist could persist. (There are mindfulness or meditation practices I like to use.)
4. Watch something funny or engaging on TV or read something uplifting.
5. Go for a walk or run - especially surrounded by nature. Helps to ground!
6. Work out/lift weights.
7. Eat something nutritious, even if I have to force myself. Our tendency when stressed or worried is to eat or drink junk. A little discipline goes a long way here.
I also try to remember that time passes, and with it, the anxiety.
But let's say that these methods have been tried and only limit our nerves to a small degree. Then we might need to look at something like cognitive therapy. What is that? It's an opportunity to look at your thoughts, especially the ones that heighten negative states like anxiety and depression, and rebuild them using rational thinking and "evidence" to the contrary.
For example, let's look at the thought, "I'm never going to succeed as a writer (or as whatever)." You might say the odds are stacked against you. Well, you'd be 100% correct - if you never write or bother to publish. Do you think every successful writer was convinced of success before he/she reached it? Do you think it will help you feel better if you sit around and lament? Would your time be better off learning about writing, marketing, etc..., than giving yourself negative self-talk?
ALSO, have you ever been surprised by an outcome before? If so, is there a chance you might be again? You get the gist.
Most importantly, when I'm going through self-doubt, I ask myself if there's anything I'd really rather be doing than writing these characters? The answer is usually no. That being the case, how can I be wasting time? If the answer is yes, then maybe I'd move along my merry way looking for my bliss elsewhere.
Anxiety can be a mobilizer rather than a deterrent. All it takes is a little practice.
For more on mental health, check out this writer's blogs at The Search For Love, Sex, and Self in Relationships: here. And happy writing!
